The Endless Journey Toward Integrity

From Jaimie

I had a deeply impactful mentor during my early ministry preparation as a young adult. Let me tell you, she had her hands full. At 22, I was exceptionally full of myself and lacking in life experience (which is never a great combo.) It didn’t take long for me to find myself in over my head in a situation I was wholly unprepared for in ministry. She went to immense lengths to support me, including opening up her home as a safe haven for me to land as I wrestled with my personal, spiritual, and vocational calling. At the time, I was at significant odds with the ministry I was working for as I faced accusation, toxicity, and abuse. I was young and cared deeply about what others thought of me.

In the midst of that storm, she told me something that permanently altered the trajectory of my life and vocation. “Jaimie, if you walk in integrity before God, God will protect your reputation.” There was so very much at stake for me. My mentor steered me away from focusing on making myself palatable and acceptable to others and encouraged me to focus on the internal work of integrity. It set me on an evolutionary course of deepening my understanding of self, identity, and my place in the world. That course had some bumps and some detours.

Though the course is not over yet, the direction it has taken has been clear. The journey toward integrity is one of setting aside that which no longer aligns with who I am and what I value. Clarity about identity emerges and I must choose whether my actions and choices truly reflect who I understand myself to be. It starts with looking inward with curiosity. The next step is looking outward with courage.

I believe that the Christian Church is undergoing a difficult part of its own never-ending journey toward integrity. The Church must either actively choose to align its finances, mission, values, and energy with who it says that it is. This leads us (and the broader society) to question if the Church really is what it claims to be as it is clear that the actions of Christians are often more aligned with political power than spiritual truths.

First Congregational Church has its own part to play with this struggle toward Christian integrity as a backdrop. I believe that First Congregational Church of 2022 is not the First Congregational Church of 2019, 2009, 1999 or 1959. In 2032, our church will look nothing like it does today. While the name we our congregational has claimed has not changed since the 1950s, who we are and what we look like has significantly changed every decade since our church began its journey in Battle Creek. Our identity has transformed and will continue to transform.

Through all of these changes—birth, death, beginnings, endings, transformations—a central question can keep up focused: How are we doing on this journey toward integrity? What do we need to let go of that is no longer in alignment with who we are? What truth do we need to accept about who we are today? What makes us proud about who we are and how can we fully embrace our identity? With these questions, we must have faith that our inward curiosity inspires outward courage.

The journey toward integrity as a faith community never has a destination. We never arrive at the end. Because following Jesus is about the journey, not the destination.